Tuesday, May 30, 2006

Sports! Adventure! Excitement!

Greetings, BroSpotting Revolutionaries! My name is Matt, I will be serving you as a co-admin in the colorful world of BroSpotting. Jackson is away this week on his honeymoon with his lovely new wife, and today I will be filling in. As an introductory post, allow me to expose you to some of my favorite moments in some of the Bro's favorite activities... Sports:

Is there any other sport more homo-erotic than wrestling? Answer: No.

Goodluck, and Godspeed.

Thursday, May 25, 2006

Bros + Speculation = Disastrous Results

A comment was made on the last post by an anonymous visitor to Bro Spotting. He wrote…

Could it be speculated that BroSpotting is spawned from homosexual tendencies?”

I knew the day would come when some random Bro would stumble across my site, get pissed or embarrassed, and call me a fag. Isn’t this a perfect example of how a Bro deals with situations or emotions that are unsatisfactory? If a Bro walks in to a room and sees you sitting in his favorite chair, he’ll exclaim, “Get up, Fag!” Or if you bump in to a bro while he is drinking some Gatorade, and he spills the colorful beverage all over the popped collar of his new Abercrombie polo shirt, you can expect to hear, “You Fag!” The complete inability to author an original insult is fundamental to Broism.

Based on my observations of the Bro lifestyle, I find it rather contradictory for a Bro to call anyone a fag. No other class of people spends so much time ogling the male physique. Their obsession with sculpting the most defined abs, building the biggest arms, and acquiring the perfect tan is unprecedented in any other class of humanity. Many Bros spend hours of their lives taking showers with other Bros - in the locker room or otherwise. Towels are snapped, testicles are slapped (aka – “tea-bagging”), and they still manage to call everyone else a fag. The duplicitous nature of the Bros astounds me.

To answer the question posted by Mr. Anonymous… No, I am not a homosexual (not that there’s anything wrong with that). Bro Spotting was spawned the same way any mullet spotting page was spawned. I find Bros hilarious. My friends and I have been making Bro jokes for as long I can remember. As the years went on, the jokes became more detailed and complex. That’s how the whole thing began.

Check back soon for more Brotos! If you have a Broto that you would like me to post, send it to bro.spotting@gmail.com

Tuesday, May 23, 2006

Flex, Drink, PARTY!

Here's a spectacular Broto sent in by Matt...

Notice the puka shell necklace on the second Bro from the right. A classic Bro without puka shells is like Batman without Robin, like a party without booze, like Like Jennifer Lopez without her big fat ass... a Bro just doesn't look right without his puka shells.

These shirtless Bros also provide a closer at the artificial tan that accompanies a good majority of them. Nice Broto, Matt. Keep'em coming.

We also have our first submission of fan art. Check it out...

Amazing! This was submitted by Blamo. I added a link to the Blamo site on the font page, so you should go there. I look forward to seeing what else he can bring to the table. As always, submit your Brotos to bro.spotting@gmail.com

An Article Worth Reading

I just received an interesting link from Laurie in Beaverton, OR. Read Pop goes the collar by: Nicole Zook, for a balanced look at this obnoxious trend.

Exhibit A

We have our first Broto submission by Meg. Let's examine, shall we...

Here we have the Bro Originale, wearing a popped collar polo and drinking a beer. He isn't wearing puka shells, unfortunately. Be on the hunt for a puka shell wearing Bro, and send your Brotos to bro.spotting@gmail.com

Monday, May 22, 2006

So Many Bros, So Little Time

I began this blog with the hopes of bringing awareness to (and ridicule of) a class of society that I call the Bro. We've all seen Bros, with their popped-collar polo shirts and puka shell necklaces fastened tightly around their artificially tanned necks. They reek of A&F cologne. They won't sit with their legs crossed, and pretend that it hurts them terribly when they try. This is the classic Bro - the Bro Originale. There are many Bro sub-classes, which I will explain later.

In the mean time, I will be snapping pictures of Bros that I have spotted around town (hence the title "Bro Spotting"), and I encourage you to do the same. Take some pictures, and send them to bro.spotting@gmail.com . The best Bro photos (or Brotos) will be viewed on this site, and possibly rated.

Happy Hunting,